Dad remembrance pilgrimage: Prologue

Saying goodbye to a man we loved

My dad, Rev. Dr. Lynn Williams, spent his life as a Minister of Word and Sacrament in the Presbyterian Church (USA). Unfortunately, after a lifetime serving congregations in Iowa and Nebraska, as well as a career as a chaplain in Army National Guard, dad ended up being diagnosed with vascular dementia. His health gradually declined and he spent the last five yers of his life in Calvin Community, a care center in Des Moines, Iowa.

The last two years of his life were especially challenging as he dealt with the isolation from the pandemic, his own bout with COVID, and probably a couple of strokes. My brother, sister-in-law, a high school friend, and my step mom took amazingly good care of him, were constantly visiting, and ensuring the coordination of his care. For their ongoing work and the compassion they showed to dad, I will be forever grateful.

Because of the distance, I was only able to visit dad monthly during that time. At the end of June we we received notice from hospice that dad was very close to the end of his journey. Lily and I dropped everything and headed to Iowa to be with him at the end. The last few days were a roller coaster, but on the morning of June 29, 2022, dad took his last breath. Even though we expected his death, it was still hard to say goodbye. We were simultaneously relieved that he was no longer suffering and brokenhearted that we would not get to see him again.

The leadership of First Christian Church has been amazingly supportive throughout this whole process. They gave me all the time and flexibility I needed. Their consideration allowed me to be there with dad at the end. It is a blessing to be a part of such a loving congregation.

Honoring a good and faithful servant

The funeral was delayed for a couple of weeks because my nephew was traveling overseas. We planned the service for when he got back and reached out to everyone we wanted to participate. The extra time also allowed some extended family to attend who might not have been able to travel at shorter notice. The theme we chose for the service was the verse from Matthew 25:21, “well done good and faithful servant.” This was a reflection of dad’s dedicated service to the church, community, nation, and family.

The extra time also allowed me the flexibility to put together a plan to honor dad in my own personal way. Before my dad’s death I was signed up to participate in RevZilla’s Get On ADV Fest in Sturgis, South Dakota. I was planning to meet some friends from the Motorcycle Relief Project and do a bit of riding in the Black Hills. Dad’s funeral was scheduled for the same day as the start of the ADV Fest so I would be unable to attend even though my tickets had already been purchased.

Instead, the journey morphed into a pilgrimage that would retrace major events and locations in my dad’s life. It would allow me to visit places that had been important to him, while at the same time reconnecting with family and friends along the way. My plan didn’t work out exactly the way I expected, but In the end it turned out to be an amazingly cathartic experience. I learned pieces of my dad’s story that I had never known, and enjoyed what I can best describe as a two week wake honoring someone we all loved.

The preliminary plan

The overall idea was to leave Dexter, Missouri, after worship on Sunday, July 10, and ride north to the funeral in Des Moines. From there I was going to head in a circle around the upper midwest, going to Nebraska, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Illinois, and Kentucky. The plan was to see the churches he served, the places where his siblings lived, and the schools he attended. A quick glance at the map put the route at about 2-3,000 miles.

Because I had hoped to do some dirt road riding in Minnesota, I chose to take my 2006 BMW R1200GS, Hayden, instead of Brunhilda, my more highway oriented, 2009 BMW R1200RT. In the end I probably chose wrong, because my schedule ended up getting compressed and turned into a road-only adventure.

Even though it was not the ride I thought I would have, the motorcycle held up well and I had a truly life changing adventure while honoring my dad’s life in a unique and powerful way

Next leg: Sikeston to Canton, Missouri